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Better Me!

Acceptance

Acceptance: Action of consenting to receive or undertake something offered… Action or process of being received as adequate or suitable, typically to be admitted into a group…. The quality or state of being….. Approval… Merrimack-Webster, Oxford Language

Do you Accept or Judge self? Why? How does this make you feel? Are you hard or easy on self? Why? Do you tear self down or lift self up? Why? Are you happy, satisfied with self? Or are you disgusted, tear apart self creating destruction? How do you hide true self so the world doesn’t truly see you? Your imperfections, your scars, your marks, genes, your past, failures, fears, your struggles, your true self? Truly think about this! …..……….

Do others Accept or Judge you? Why? How does this make you feel? How are you judged by others? Why? What is accepted of you by others? Why? Why do you feel your being judged? Why do you feel your accepted? How do you respond to judgements? Why? How do you respond to acceptance? Why? Why does the judgement or acceptance of others matter?

How close are the answers from how you treat self to how others treat you? How different are the answers? Why are they different? Why are they the same? What should change? What should grow? Do you judge self and expect others not to judge you? Fix it! Do you judge others and realized you just judged yourself too? Fix it! Do others accept you as you but you don’t ? Change it, fix it, be better then the self sabotage, self lies, self destruction!

Fix yourself first. You can not fix or change anyone but yourself first. The great thing about self growth, self change, and squashing the self sabotage everything around you just falls into place. You realize what is important and what is not important. I feel we fall into a trap with self because we want to be one way but our actions go the other way. We want to be healthy but we continue to feed the body with foods that are harmful to our health. We continue to pick the lazy, comfortable route to self destruction instead of the hard and uncomfortable route to self growth. You might look at yourself and ridicule self to believing the lies. You might have learned to talk yourself out of moving forward continuously. You have fallen into the routine of justify your fears, your self destruction, creating self lies and a pro at excuses. Your eyes need open to see self for self. So you will be able to squash the self sabotage, self destruction, self hate and learn the importance of self growth, self love, self respect no matter what your journey looks like. What works for me or others will not necessarily work for you. But what will look the same is working towards self change, moving forward, and the transformation of better self!

Acceptance of self leads to acceptance by others. Once you realize your worth. When you realize and understand you can’t change the past and no control of the future. You let go and start to tackle yourself working towards the direction you dream, hope, and wish for (better you). Change occurs. your actions and words start to align! You love self for self and those round you will love you for you. You will stop the self lies, self sabotage, self destruction and you will find your self free from excuses, blaming, judging, and control. You grow and those around you will grow and it will push you to grow. You accept self for self and every day you work to be better. Those around you will do the same. Before you realize all the tiny steps, the baby steps, the big steps you took towards better self all added up to true self transformation of accepting self for self! Accept self NOW!

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Better Me!

Past to Present: Lies to Truth: Exist to Growth

Crazy how one life event can open so much. To a point of reviling other peoples skeletons. Those skeletons then attack another innocent person and their life. During this time, creating little tiny beans that grew up and knew to be better then the past environment. It is very sad, pathetic, and fearful of what each generation brings to the next generation. It actually is quit sad that the authorities (parents, family member, boss, spouse, etc..) and take advantage of their authority. It is also quit mind boggling to think one has that much power of authority. It breaks my heart that weakness was stronger then doing right. What keeps a person closed minded to the truth? How and what continues to lurk inside these people to continue to violate others? Then turn around and justify their action. To justify their action to the point if not strong it will destroy that person.

Do we excuse past behavior to keep it silent? Is it silent because it has not resurfaced yet? Does it mean different generations it’s justifiable? Does it mean Different titles its justifiable? Does it mean excuses and blaming is tolerated to rid your horrible choice on another person who is at no fault? Do you justify and truly believe your validation to rid you of your choice so you do not have to take responsibility?

Taking responsibility for yourself, your actions, your choices, your words, your behavior leads to life of freedom and peace. Taking ownership of self frees you from what holds you back. You can’t change the past. You can’t control anyone but yourself. You can only move forward and better yourself. Your actions, choices, behavior effect those around you. What kind role model are you? What kind of sample are you setting? What kind of effect is your presence? Are you the continuous problem? Why is it so hard to take responsibility for self?

How do you forgive those you love, those you trust, those you respected, strangers, friends, family, choices, decisions, behaviors, actions, words, reactions and the truth? How do you let go of the suffering, the unknown, the pain, the behavior, the fear? How do you grow and move forward from the environment one has known their entire life? What does it take to be better then your past, your destruction, your self pity, your self excuses, your self titles?

What in your life is stopping you from moving forward? You have this one life. Do you choose destruction or growth? But I hope you choose Growth for the importance of your one life. Moving forward is doing something for your self each day. Rather it is getting out of bed the first day, eating a salad, cleaning your house, walk, making it on time for appointment or work, reading, researching, saying no, tackling your self that is steps forward no matter what the step is. We tend to forget we all live a different life. We follow and not lead. Why live someone’s else’s life when you have your life right in front of you. It’s your creation, your life, you and only you create your life but all I can say you have to work for life you want unless you are that fortunate one who gets it handed. Biggest advise I pass to you is give your negativity, your past, and your future barely to no time (thoughts, in your head) and let it go. Be in the NOW! Give your time to being present and tackling moving forward.

To give advice is easy but doing the work is hard. I write about myself and pushing to be better. What helps me to be better, to move forward. Life is hard and truly we are alone. I will continue to write about myself to help myself grow. To help others realize their worth and we all have a story. Some are plain Jane and others or wild, crazy, and unfortunate. Thank you for taking your time to read. Shereen Leyden

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Better Me!

Comparison: Self vs Others mindset vs destruction

How often do you compare yourself to others? Why? When is comparison helpful? When is comparison damaging? Why do our brains use comparison to figure out how to measure up to other people?

I truly feel in some way we all compare ourself to one another. We compare I feel because of what the other person is capable of doing. We compare the worse of ourselves to the best we see in others. When we compare we have resentment towards others and towards ourself. I feel comparison is a negative and anxious thought that is beyond hard, I feel, to come out of. I feel comparison makes one feel less then, starts silence, less active, damages self esteem, feeling of worthless, feeling of not being enough, jealousy, envy, depression, anxiety, over spending, affects the ability to trust, and takes away from YOU.

Does comparison have value? Does comparison have true meaning? Does comparison fulfill your life? Does comparison add to what you want defining you? Does comparison make you stronger? Does comparison motivate you? Does comparison get you outside your comfort zone? Does comparison add to your uniqueness?

If comparison is making you who you are not. If comparison is destroying you. It is time to stop. START tackling comparison by getting rid of what creates it. I feel social media has huge part of comparing self to others. Turn it off and take a break. Journal if you need to so you can compare the difference. You need to practice gratitude and make it a habit. Put the time and energy into your own life. Create the life, the you, you want to be. Stop comparing your self to the highlight, spotlight, none reality moments and realize it is not the complete story you are comparing too. You are meant for this life for a reason so focus on you, focus on your strengths, focus on what you want defining you as YOU, and focus on your accomplishments small and big. Instead of comparing yourself to others cheer them on and be happy for them. Understand it is their accomplishment, it is their journey, it is them being a better me. So be happy for other people. Never take what is not yours. Try to compare against yourself before you compare yourself to others. Setting boundaries is a must across the board, with people, with social media, with television, with what takes away from you becoming YOU. Stop impulse buying, stop fearing that you will miss out, don’t be annoyed by others success, don’t delete because it didn’t get enough response, and stop always checking who liked your post. Just let it be and one day it will be viewed by the right person.

So focus on you! Focus on your life! Focus on what you want defining you! Focus on what makes you happy! Focus on gratitude! Focus on keeping up with self. Focus on comparing yourself to yesterday. YOU ARE ENOUGH! Be true, Be YOU!

”It’s one of the most basic ways we develop an understanding of who we are, what we’re good at, and what we’re not so good at”.

Thomas Mussweiler – professor of organizational behavior, describes comparison

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